Is Santa coming?

Zoe is a very cool plane traveller. Not so happy during the lengthy car trips, which was a shame, given the lack of places to pull over and reconcile a crying bubba between the city and Gosford. The best news is that Dad has been given the 'all clear', and will be fine once he has recovered from the trauma of his major operation. We arrived home yesterday and, realising that that day is imminent, put up the Christmas tree last night. This is a rather special artefact. It comes from a factory where my Pa, Poss Hemmings, once worked. I have recollections from my childhood of it being a rather enormous tree, so when I put it up now, I get a little bit disappointed. It does look rather smart though, although the baby barrier around the bottom detracts a little. Zoe is not too sure. I now need to make some time this week to shop for presents.

Backyard pictures

Here's some pics of our backyard before we started cleaning it up, which involved several ute loads of garden waste and lattice being taken to the tip. Our aim is to make it baby friendly, so we're trying to establish some lawn, and hope to pave a small area, establish the vege garden, replace the fence and, rather unfortunately, remove the trees you can see. I think they are macadamias. Can anyone confirm that from these photos? I also want a swing for bubba.

Longer term, we'd like to get rid of the rather enormous shed, which will double the size of the yard when we do , and replace the rainwater tank.

Where has the year gone?

December is a typically mad month for me. Is it so for everyone else? Must be the panic of realising I haven't acheived all that I had hoped in the months previous. This is particularly true with my study, which should be a little more advanced than it is, even when factoring in baby Zoe's presence.

So, in true form, I am dashing down to Sydney next week to give things a kick along. The fact that my Dad has just had major surgery and could use some help at home gives me a good excuse to make this trip. We will go by plane, which is a little scary, but I am sure all will be fine.

Ewan had a four day weekend last week, during which we endeavoured to paint the lounge room. It was supposed to be a fun, bonding experience, but was really just a nightmare, particularly up to the painting stage. After four long days, including juggling the care of Zoe, who wanted to be in the thick of the action, we have painted the ceiling and three of the walls and doors. We have a 'divorce wall', that requires a lot more work, but might remain in it's current state for a little while longer. We pulled fake brown wood panelling off this wall [very 80's], sanded and sanded and then undercoated it, but it still needs some help. Maybe after Christmas. The room itself does look much better, regardless.

I'd like to post some pictures, but can't remember where the camera-PC cable is at the moment. Sorry.

bruises

Zoe's prediliction for pulling herself up on furniture has led to a few bumps and bruises in the last few days, mostly on her forehead and cheeks. Apparently this is normal for babies of this age. She's very 'busy' at the moment, going here and there and pulling up on everything. As we're in the middle of prep'ing and painting the living areas of the house, this is making things tricky. Most of the work is being done at night.

It's been consistently very hot here, maybe a little unusual for early summer, but not too unexpected. Zoe has been suffering from the heat a little, and is maybe teething too, so has been pretty uncomfortable. A cooler change yesterday was most welcome.

Baby milestones

Have failed to celebrate some of Zoe's recent milestones on her blog recently. Sorry Zoe. We now have two bottom teeth, and it seems that the top ones are trying to push through. At 8 months, and as of last week, she is now crawling, which is a really fantastic thing I think, for her and for me. Her new habit of pulling up on furniture has also led to a first, big, bruise on her cheek. Real tears! This also means that she can roll over and stand up in her cot, 'yelling', when she doesn't want to go to sleep. The sleep thing continues to be a bit problematic.

We had a weigh in at the clinic last week, and her weight gain hasn't been what it should. Possible explanations include her week of illness, new level of activity, and general dislike of any food that is not yoghurt. She still loves her mummy's milk though, and, according to Anne, our clinic nurse, she loves it a little bit too often. I'm not really willing to do too much about that though.

Cousins

Here's a photo of Myia, Ella and Zoe, taken this week by Sue from http://suzephotography.com/

Breathing space

We are now in our new house. The cupboards might be stuffed with unopened boxes, but at least most things are away. The move itself was fairly horrific, despite the dual luxuries of removalists and a cleaner [for the 'old' house]. Poor Zoe was very sick, and became progressively worse as the week went on, which ended up in a course of antibiotics. Needless to say I was happy for her to take them, just to get my little girl back. What started as a cold, migrated to her chest, and then culminated a couple of vomiting incidents [was most frightening the first time it happened]. We even took a 4am trip to the hospital [it is now only two blocks away], although they sent us home without looking at her [apparently her temperature wasn't high enough].

In between caring for my sick [and admittedly very cuddly] bubba, we had to re-clean parts of the 'old' house, to be sure of securing our bond, as well as deal with a flea infestation and remve a lot of rubbish at the 'new' house.

We're getting used to living in town. It's very urban which, despite our time in Sydney, is a bit of a shock. I think it has something to do with the neighbours actually wanting to know us [and there are so many of them], rather than going out of their way to ignore you. Harry is finding it difficult being a town dog too, on top of the fleas.

Pretty in pink

3 days until we move. Still have much to pack, but it is mostly under control. I am spending a little time this afternoon studying, to take the edge off my anxiety about how little time I give to this part of my life.

Okay, so I got a little distracted... but isn't she beautiful [and she has her mouth closed Erica].

First tooth

Our first tooth broke the surface on Friday. Hooray! Since then, we've been feeding more frequently at night, and have been back in bed with Mum and Dad. It's almost like having a newborn again. Zoe seems [mostly] hungry at these times, probably because she's so busy playing and so distractible [sp.?] during the day, that she can't find the time to focus on her milk feeds. I'm not sure what role the small amount of solid [that's a misnomer - its more 'mush'] food plays. Have made progress with the sipper cup, thanks to the fact that she likes to chew on the spout, and gets some water as a consequence.

Feeding is very messy, as you can see, but it is also so much fun. Zoe loves holding and guiding the spoon, then playing with it when she has decided she has finished, which adds to the mess/fun.

We move house in about 5 days.

Today I'm feeling like I ...

Can't wait until I have one of those jobs where all I have to do is go 'to work' and mow the lawn. Bliss.

Aaahhhhh

We seem to have turned a corner on a number of different things with Zoe, which has made life a little easier for both of us. Maybe they are all related. Vanilla yoghurt and milk arrowroot biscuits have proven to be favourite first foods - it seems it was just a case of finding something she liked. The challenge now is to diversify a little bit, by offering some of the veges I have cooked and frozen in readiness for when her appetite/tastebuds kick in. Feeding is now such a mess, but I'm just happy that she's happily accepting something. Am also trying to introduce water from a sipper cup...

Playtime is a lot more fun too, as baby is able to get onto her hands and knees [not really rocking back and forth yet] and then collapse forwards toward the object of her desire. Although she often gets stuck [draped across the top of the train toy], she won't immediately protest, but instead considers ways out of her predicament. Having this extra reach has reduced her frustration and given me a little bit of space to move too.

The final thing is a change to her waking at night. We only wake once, for a feed, in the early hours of the morning and then - dare I say it? - she is sleeping until 7am, in her own bed, rather than ours. While we miss the early morning cuddles, everyone is feeling a lot more refreshed. I hope this pattern continues, but with the impending arrival of daylight savings, and the house move in two weeks, who knows?

Welcome Myia Katie Clarke

toe sucking

Started toe sucking yesterday, which is very cute and rather clever. Will try to get a photo, but I'm usually changing a nappy at the time, which makes it kinda hard.

Pictures

Zoe and Dad on an outing to the House with No Steps, with GAP, and having her first swim, with Mum.

Immunisation

Poor little Zoe has been suffering somewhat following Tuesday's immunisations; she has two large red rashes/bruises on each thigh where she was injected, and has been much more cuddly than usual [a not unpleasant side effect for me]. I had been warned by other Mums that it 'gets worse', and now I know what was meant. I remembered to give her a dose of children's paracetamol yesterday, which did seem to perk her up [or at leat provide enough relief to let her get to sleep].

And here's a post in English....

The previous post was a summary for my friends in Belgium, who I lived with many many years ago, and who have been dilgently wading through these musings. Don't be too impressed about my ability to ecrit en francais either- there's a lot web tools that make it ridiculously easy to translate text, although you do need to be vigilant.

We had the last of Zoe's bi-monthly immunisations today, which is a relief. She was, as usual, very brave, and regained her composure quickly. We go to the monthly clinic [the wait seems shorter than at the doctor's], and I was moved to tears today by the cries of a couple of the baby babies.

Feeding of solids is not going too well, if success is judged by the volume of food that she is consuming. I am trying to give her something each day - pears at the moment - although the timing is a bit erratic. I'm not too bothered by her ambivalence, but if it was anything else you'd be tempted to give it away. It's not that I'm keen to see her eating, but I do want to make sure that her iron levels are boosted or maintained, and, dare I say it, I'm planning to do that by eventually introducing meat. [Sure, it makes this vegetarian mommy a bit squirmish, but at least I won't be tempted by the leftovers!].

Zoe continues to do cool stuff, like sitting up unaided on her play mat for good lengths of time [best not to sit her too close to the coffee table], and is quite comfortable on her tummy, but gets frustrated at not being able to get what or where she wants. She is also babbling away quite noisily, stringing lots of sounds together, which is exceptionally cute. She is also very tactile, fingering all sorts of fabric from blankets to bibs to furniture and clothes, with an especial liking for those with patterns and texture - I have a pair of camoflague pants [I avoid wearing them in public] with zips and lots of pockets, which keep her amused for, oh, at least three minutes [which is a lot of time in baby's world of endless distractions].

Un petit sommaire pour mes amis en Belgique

Zoe est maintenant de six mois. Nous avons commencé les solides, hors dont elle crache toujours mais semblons parfois apprécier. Nos nouvelles marquantes sont que nous avons acheté une maison dans Ballina. Elles ont besoin d'un bon nombre de travail, et sont sur un complot de terrain très petit, mais elles sont dans la distance de marche des magasins et le fleuve et beaucoup de parcs, y compris ceux où nous pouvons exercer notre chien.

Dans autre nouvelle, Ewan a eu une opération de genou il y a deux semaines [ pas aussi sérieux que Francois-Xavier's - j'espere qu'il est bien] and a été à la maison depuis. Ceci lui a donné une chance de développer sa confiance avec Zoe - il s'est inquiété de sa cette semaine tandis qu'I s'occupait de l'université pour la moitié par jour.

Nous avons eu une promenade de famille aux courses de chevaux a Ballina. C'était amusement à obtenir habillé vers le haut, pour prendre un pique-nique, et aller reposez-vous au soleil et observez les chevaux et le peuple. Zoe l'a trouvé trop bruyant, mais sa disposition facile a signifié qu'elle ne s'est pas plainte trop.

La photo est de Zoe et de ma soeur Sally, qui est de 8 mois d'enceinte avec son deuxième enfant.

6 months old

Has been a flurry of activity in our house in the past week: negotiations to buy 'our' house progressed - then stalled - and are back on track again; Ewan had his knee operation, which included an overnight stay on the Gold Coast, with a shopping expedition for Mum and bub. A family outing to the Ballina Cup, with picnic blanket, beach umbrella, thermos for tea and Great Aunty Pat [GAP] was great fun on Thursday, with perfect weather - only challenge was the noise of a huge crowd and constant loudspeaker announcements, which over stimulated, and occasionally scared, poor bubba Zoe. I'm disappointed I didn't take a photo of her in her pretty pink races outfit [thanks Aunty Sheona!].

We also bought a highchair, which she has been practising sitting in - see attached photo of Zoe playing with the feathers on GAP's fascinator.

A visit to Anne, our early childhood nurse on Wednesday for her 6 month [yes, already!] developmental check went very well; in the wave of information it was suggested we start on a teaspoon of rice cereal once a day for a few weeks. I've translated this into a teaspoonful of oatmeal, that I understand is much more nutritious, which I have only managed a couple of times. Ewan gave this to Zoe the other night [rather than the recommended 930am...sometimes the days just get away on me], and she seemed to enjoy it so much that we wondered if she was wanting more. Had a bit of trouble with the 'porridge' last night, because I tried to mix it with breastmilk, but will persevere. Was also some advice about dropping the number of feeds, which saw me expressing into the bathroom sink at 330am the first night, and which has therefore, been filed away for actioning at a later date. I can only cope with these changes one at a time ;-)

Happy baby

Home ownership

We just bought a house! Although we only spent 5 minutes looking through the place, we've today agreed to buy a small house on 'the island' in Ballina. Here's a link
http://www.raywhite.com/cgi-bin/rsearch?a=depi&id=103411754&fmt=&header=&t=rw-hos&s=nsw&p=10&tm=1157328538&c=93694661

There's plenty of money to spend on it - it is fair to say that the place is in 'original' condition - but [hopefully] the bones are good, and the location is excellent. Ewan's not so sure that this is the one - I think he is a little worried about how much work it might need, how close the neighbours are, you know, just worried - but I used my casting vote to get the place. Although we've been looking for months, it has all happened so quickly. I'm excited.

Feeding

Since we're almost 6 months old [24 weeks], I decided to try Zoe with a little solid food, after doing some [internet] research on the what and how of introducing solids as a complementary food. Last night, Ewan gave her a couple of small teaspoons of mashed banana, an experience I think she enjoyed. I also shoved some into her today... just because I could. Then I decided that we could wait a few days before trying again. What a mess!

Another milestone today - Zoe rolled over by herself! After several days of throwing her hips high and sliding around and down - which I took as a sign of wanting to be more mobile - she managed to roll herself over [away from the toys] on her mat on the floor. Unfortunately, I was in the bathroom cleaning my teeth, and only heard her surprise. Her arm was still stuck underneath, but I made sure she realised how proud Mumma was!

Will post some more photos this weekend - I know they make the posts more interesting ...

Milking time

I think we've had or are having a growth spurt - bubba seems to want to feed more randomly. The downside of this is that my milk supply is up, as is my empathy for those poor dairy cows! The upside, of course, is that baby does not go hungry. I am resisting the urging of others to start her on solids because, as you can see from the photo, Mummy's milk seems to be providing enough nourishment at present.

Tummy time

Zoe is much happier on her tummy than she has ever been, due mainly to lots of practice these last few weeks [although she still finds it pretty exhausting]. This apparently develops her back muscles, and will eventually lead to crawling. All this practice means Mummy has spent a lot of time on her tummy too, encouraging and praising bubba for all her hard work.

Baby milestones

Bubba Zoe continues to amaze her Mum and herself this week. She's realised that you can splash water while having a bath, and does so with much vigour. We have also discovered our feet, and like to play with them when on the change table, which is very cute, except when trying to clean a dirty bottom; now both feet and hands need to be kept clear of the offending mess. Unfortunately, Zoe's first tooth continues to give her grief - I'm sure I felt it a few weeks back, but now, nothing but red gums and much saliva. Poor dear - I remember how much pain can be caused by wisdom teeth.

Have had a busy week, putting Aunty Melissa on the plane back to Sydney on Tuesday night; then joining a Breastfeeding Awareness Week morning tea at Mullumbimby Hospital with about 30 other mums 'n bubs [we all crave cake and company] followed by a middle eastern dinner at Aunty Litza's house, cooked by her Mum yesterday. Today we visited Great Uncle Ken at Lismore Base Hospital [he's okay], then went in to my work at the Uni for a presentation. So it's been early to bed tonight. Tomorrow, we rest.

No house

We gave it all we had at the auction yesterday - which was fast and furious - but pulled out at what we felt was the maximum value of the house, allowing another young family to win. Post-auction we were a little deflated, which was probably due to all those endorphins dropping so quickly, but had justified our actions by mid afternoon. After all, as we keep telling ourselves, the streets are full of houses. I'd like to think I can have a break from the whole home ownership quest for a while, but there is something strangely compelling about the process...

We've had my youngest sister visiting this week, which has been fantastic. Zoe is coping pretty well with the flurry of social activity, and clearly adores her Aunty Melissa. Here's a photo of them with cousin Ella.

Update

Zoe has been sleeping really well in her cot; still waking to feed twice during the night, but that's okay, and it's a relatively efficient operation these days, compared to those early weeks. Of course, I miss having her close, so we bring her in to our bed most mornings, and some nights. I now have the evidence that this is not only okay, but is desirable for baby's wellbeing [thanks to a book recommended by Erica called The Family Bed].

We still plan to bid for 'our house' at an auction Saturday week. We don't really rate our chances - maybe one in three? - but it's a case of needing to be 'in it to win it'. Are auctions gambling too?

Okay - I have maybe 30 minutes available to me while Zoe naps. Do I a) do some study b) take a shower and wash my hair or c) put a load of washing on? I think the shower will win this morning. Ciao!

Daycare dilemma

Packed up bubba and drove to Lismore for our weekly daycare morning after two weeks off, only to find that it is still school holidays - a pupil free day. This meant no care for Zoe and, for me, no Uni. And Daddy is home on a rostered day off. Thought I'd salvage the situation by taking Zoe to see the Margaret Olley exhibition at the Lismore Regional Art Gallery. Plan B was aborted when arrived with baby in pouch to find the gallery closed. Hmmm. So Plan C was a quick soy decaf cappuccino at the cafe, then home to Ballina. At least bubba had two 40 minute sleeps in the car?!

Cousins - Zoe, Callum and Eilidh

Own bed

We paid a visit to Anne, the baby health nurse yesterday, for a check up. She suggested that at four months old it was time to look at baby sleeping habits. So yesterday afternoon the cot, change table and nursing chair went back into Zoe's as-of-then unused room. Last night, Daddy put her to bed in her cot, for the first time. He went in once to settle her. Then she slept until waking for a feed at midnight, and another at 330am. She was awake and ready for her 'first' feed of the day at 7am. How easy was that? We are lucky to have such a settled baby. Oops, she's crying now - we're trying the morning sleep in the cot...

Study

We loved the house we inspected on Saturday, but once the inital excitement wore off realised that it would probably go for more at auction than we are prepared to pay. Made an offer on another, much smaller house in town when the agent called this morning. It was rejected, which is okay. At least we've put something out there.

Aunty Sally is looking after baby Zoe this morning [as a swap for doing her quarterly bookwork]. Am taking the opportunity to do some study. My maternity leave period is offically over, so I need to apply myself, develop a work routine, and make a decision about whether I can remain a full time student, which is my preferred option. And not get distracted...

Counting chickens

Just as I was considering putting her out on the street in a basket with a 'free to good home' sign, Zoe has almost slept through the night. I fed and changed her while she was still sleeping at 1am, then Ewan got up to make sure she was still breathing at 4am, then I encouraged her to feed again at about 6am. Yeah! Another night like that and we won't know ourselves. Past experience though says don't get too excited...

We're off to view a house today that we expect to really like. It's brick and tile and suburban boring, but probably exactly what we need. I've sworn not to get too emotionally attached to this one. And we have an acceptable back up plan if we can't find a house this month, whicn is to buy an [affordable] block of land in a new Ballina estate, and stay living here for another 12 months, then build something nice at a later date.

Talking

Baby is really responsive to singing and talking - we've been having some great early morning discussions, peppered with lots of smiles and laughter. And I'm sure she sang a little bit of you are my sunshine back to me the other morning. Jo thinks I'm just delirious from lack of sleep!

This almost makes up for the night waking.

TV babies

Our second morning at the carer's house in Lismore yesterday went well. This time Zoe stayed for 3 hours. I went to the library and tried to busy myself, all the time thinking I could/should be sleeping [we had a tough time of it on the weekend]. As I was leaving Lexie, our lovely carer, told me she was going to prop Zoe in front of the TV for a while. Aarrgghhh!Agonised over this for a while - my understanding is that any TV for the under 3's is not good for their brains - then decided to let it go. This is the 21st century. And geez, what do I expect when the care is costing $3 an hour? I was embarassed at the price. Surely my daughter is worth more?

Teething

After two weeks of serious hand chewing, gum gnashing and dribbling I have come to the conclusion that Zoe is teething. It's kind of early, but the evidence is a solid little lump under her front top gum. Problem is that she would rather chew my hand [dummies just don't cut it anymore] than feed most of the time. Although, as you can see from this photo, lack of nutrition is not a problem. Looking very 'cool' in the furry jacket GAC has sent. Only problem is, she wants to chew it...

Zoe's Grandma [in Scotland] thinks I should be considering giving her solids, or at least a bottle of formula, last thing at night to help her sleep through. I appreciate Grandma's concern, but again, hunger is not really an issue. I think her night waking, which I'm relaxed and generally unconcerned about, is to do with pooing or maybe teething, or even just habit. There is also research that shows that frequent mother-baby contact [gained mostly through co-sleeping] is good for babies' brain development. If not for Mum's.

Good girl

Daycare went very well. Zoe wasn't upset by the arrangement, and Mummy coped well too. I spent about 1/2 an hour at Lexie's house with Zoe before leaving [for two hours] and when I arrived back, which I hope helped. Bubba even slept for an hour in a big girl's cot! I know that there will be tears at some stage - apparently the 6 month mark - but by then she'll be in familiar surrounds.

Achieved nothing in the time I was at Uni - not even a coffee at the library - but gossiped and politicked a bit. Will plan to at least borrow a book from the library next week.

Separation anxiety

Aunty Sally, Uncle Wonder and Ella babysat Zoe on Friday night for a few hours, while Ewan and I went out in Byron for dinner. We were gone for 3 hours, and that was enough for me! Zoe did have a fitful 15 minutes part-way through the night, maybe due to the fact that I wasn't there to settle her, but AS and UW coped admirably, and she was asleep when we came to pick her up.

Tomorrow is a bigger test - we are 'trialling' family day care for Zoe. I am very nervous, but am sure that this is the right thing to do, given that I have to get back to studying in some capacity. Soon. So the plan is to drive Zoe to Lismore with me, where she will be cared for by an older lady who I know, who lives next to the Uni, and who has cared for a friend's children. Maybe tomorrow I will only leave her there for an hour or two. Same the following week. Then we'll have two weeks off for the school holidays, and re-evaluate after that. The boob juice is pumped and ready to go. Wish us luck!

Congratulations to Dave and Colette on the birth of their little boy Jake in Lismore on Thursday 15th. I had forgotten how little and wrinkly newborn babies are! Although the 13 weeks between them seems enormous at the moment, I'm sure that Jake will be beating up on Zoe [in a good, brotherly kind of way] before too long.

Pictures - 3 months old

Here's a picture of Zoe with her Pa, with Colette, and in one of Aunty Julie's cute outfits.

Topsy turvy

Methinks baby Zoe is having a 'growth spurt' at the moment. That's the only explanation I have for the relatively erratic feeding times and accompanying grizzles. Wish it all didn't happen between 130am and 530am though. Great news is that she seems to have some control over her hands - is starting to independently gripping things such as blankets/clothes and her dog toy [likeness of a dog, not designed for one].

My Dad, Zoe's Pa, is visiting at the moment, which is lovely for the both of them. Luckily for Pa, Zoe is willing to be cradled in his arm or sit on his lap for extended periods of time while he reads the papers or watches the news on TV, without too much complaint. This is how I think Dad expects babies to behave. Shame he is always out or asleep when she is at her most beligerent. Will post a photo of the two of them soon.

Sleepless

Little Zoe gave us our first [largely] sleepless night in a long time last night. Either the takeaway coffee I had at 4pm was not really decaffinated or the stress of househunting - and considering putting an offer in on a rural block of land - was being transferred to her somehow. Maybe both. As suggested by Jo [see previous post], I really should be directing my energies elsewhere, such as re-starting my PhD...

I did call into the Family Daycare office yesterday to discuss finding bubba a childcare place. The longer I talked with the staff about it, the more I realised that being separated from Zoe, even for 4 hours a week, is not something I particularly want to do. But then there is the small matter of the aforementioned PhD. Must be heartbreaking for mothers who need to go back to full time work early after the birth.

Future soccer player?

Zoe is developing some new party tricks. She 'kicks' a ball [with bells in it] when placed between her feet on her baby chair. She surprises herself when the ball is kicked up to her arms - doesn't quite understand that those arms are hers, and she will be able to control them soon. And anyway, that would be a handball... She will also grip her rattle and appears to shake it [those arms again]. Is really rewarding to see these things happening.

Here's a picture of Jo and Zoe having a cuddle. It's great having a friend living around the corner who is babywise.

Feeling better

Baby Zoe seems a little better, although she still has a runny nose, which causes her to choke and cough sometimes. My 'virus' only lasted about 24 hours, but I'm not sure if Zoe had the same symptoms or not. It would be so much easier if babies could tell us how they feel. Or even if they could just blow their noses a little!

Mum and bub unwell

I have developed some flu-like symptoms over the last 24 hours, on top of my own sniffles. I wonder if Zoe feels as rotten as me? Best guess is that she does, so I've been giving her some Infant's panadol, which is hopefully helping her. Poor little possum is hardly complaining at all.

Snuffles

Zoe has developed a cold - her first - which in this case means a snotty nose and difficulty breathing. Aunty Sally came to the rescue yesterday with a vaporiser and supplies, including a big bottle of eucalyptus oil. As a result I think we all slept better. Much cooler this morning too, which means it is time to consider using the heater, with the timer on, to reduce the early morning chill. We tend to feed at 530am, which is also the time poor Ewan needs to get up and ready for work, so a bit of warmth will be lovely for all.

First Holiday

We returned yesterday from a lovely weekend away to Yamba where we stayed in an apartment with Aunty Sally and Uncle Wonder, friends Kim and Trottie and their 5 m.o. baby girl Tallulah. Both babies were very well behaved, as were the adults. We all ate well, played some fun round robin tennis [the first time for me since pre-pregnancy], played games and listened to music. Getting out of the house, sharing the meal preparation and having Aunty Sally help with the baby cuddles made this a refreshing break. The amount of 'stuff' we had to pack to get there was a surprise though!

Great news this morning is that our friends Erica and Noah gave birth to a little healthy little girl on Friday. It already seems so long ago [10 weeks tomorrow] that Zoe was born. Those delicious few days after her birth, full of cuddles and with little regard for the 'outside' world were so enjoyably surreal. If you are interested, see Noah and Erica's blog at http://bushbaby1.blogspot.com/

Mothers Day

A bitter sweet day today. Continue to be very sad that I don't have my Mum to share the day with. Rather than ignore the occasion, as we have done for the last three years, Sally and I cooked two of our Mum's 'signature dishes' - rolled pav and zucchini slice. Took these over to the lake for an afternoon picnic, which Ella was particularly thrilled about. It seems we've found a way to incorporate some ceremony into the day, even if it involves cooking!

Of course, it is also lovely to now be a mother myself. I have an intimate understanding of how the mothering job is at once joyous and exhausting.

We miss you Mum.

Photo

Here's a recent photo of Zoe.

Ouch!

Zoe had her first set of immunisations, for eight week olds, yesterday afternoon at the clinic attached to the hospital. She screamed when she received the injections, one in each leg at the same time. This caused mummy to cry too, which is an apparently normal although embarrasing reaction. She settled down quickly, but was then inconsolable for a couple of hours early in the evening. I gave her some children's paracetamol and we applied some cold cloths to the injection sites, but it was her rocker that eventually soothed her, once she had cried and screamed herself hoarse in Mummy and Daddy's arms.

We had a good night's sleep though, with bubba waking every four hours, which gave Mummy a little bit of extra time in bed between feeds. At 5 kilos, she is starting to get not only heavier but stronger and more assertive, which means that some feeds are a struggle as she wiggles and flails her arms around, scratching me and herself in the process. The nail file came out again this morning, for her second 'manicure'. Even though I'd like to go to the Mum's and Bub's group in Byron today that Kira's mum told us about, we'll have a quiet day at home instead, as I have outings planned for the rest of the week and don't want to overdo it.

First party

Zoe went to her first birthday party on Saturday, for cousin Ella, who turned 3. I think it was all a little bit overwhelming, coming as it did at the end of a busy week, that included daily outings. Will try to restrict these this week, or at least keep them short.

I had dressed Zoe in a georgeous little pink overall set for the party, sent over by her Aunty Julie and cousins in Scotland. It lasted about 45 minutes before she soiled it sounfortunately, I didn't get a photo.

We had a great day yesterday. Dad even agreed to watch bubba Zoe in the afternoon so I could catch up on some sleep - what a difference an extra two hours makes. It was also good practice for when I start focusing on my study again, as I hope that Sundays will be 'daddy's day', allowing me uninterrupted time working on my thesis.

Baby friends

Yesterday we met and had coffee with another bubba from Ballina who was born at Mullum hospital the day before Zoe. Although we hadn't met before, baby Kira's Mum and I felt a connection, not least because she had listened to and silently supported me through my labour. So much to chat about! Baby Kira is adorable, and while the girls are a bit too young to connect, I think bubba Zoe was mildly curious.

The day before we went back to the clinic. I hadn't been for three weeks but wanted to have a weigh in, to check our little girl's progress. She is now almost 5 kilos, which puts her in the 'big baby' league. Thankfully, her length and head circumference are proportional to this. Looks like we're going to have a chubba bubba, which, as my mother in law tells me, isn't so bad when a baby is breastfed. As a result of this visit, we're going to try to extend the time between feeds to 4 hours. I realise that what I'm doing is close to 'parent directed feeding', or PDF, but bubba Zoe doesn't seem to mind. I started out demand feeding, as this seemed to be the right thing to do, but the early childhood nurse put me off this, and I guess at the end of the day I'm a little selfish and enjoy the small amount of structure this regulated approach has bought into my day. I can plan outings and activities [and do housework] with some idea of when the next feed may be. A quick web search on PDF though shows that this type of feeding isn't well recognised by many of the purists, in much the same way as dummies and, I suspect, automatic swings aren't really advocated, but it's working for us and that's what counts.

Today, we're off to Byron to visit our GP, and to have lunch with a friend who is due to give birth in less than 5 weeks. Babies, babies everywhere!

Family photo

Our dear friend Kirsty took this picture for us on Good Friday morning. Baby Zoe was about 4 1/2 weeks old - she's 7 weeks tomorrow.

Pink and blue

It's funny how hung up many people are on the 'boys wear blue, girls wear pink' tradition. I happen to think my baby looks cute in all shades of blue [she looks equally good in green]. Of course, we don't really care what people think, but it makes them uncomfortable when I don't have any markers to help them guess Zoe's gender. So I've bought a pink dummy, to help things along. Now I need to try to use it more than the blue one!

Smiles!

Zoe has been smiling reflexively for a few weeks now, curling the outside of her lips up. As of yesterday, we've noticed these have changed to full, open mouthed grins, and her whole face appears lit with joy. Let's call this her first smile!

First bottle

Zoe's had her first bottle [of expressed milk] last night - delivered by a very happy Daddy. I was slightly disappointed that she didn't even fight it a little bit; was hoping for some sign that Mummy's boobs are better. Yes, that's very selfish of me, and I'm sure I won't feel the same way in a couple of months. The breastfeeding Nazis warn that babies can get 'nipple confusion' when fed this way, and I'm not convinced that she took to the next feed at the boob with as much gusto, but geez, you should have seen the size of the smile on Dad's face.

Also made some progress on the night time sleep [or wakelfulness] problem. Am back to swaddling bubba with her arms across her chest, rather than leaving them free to flap around. As a result we had one short 2am feed and then Zoe settled back to sleep quite quickly in the bassinet, rather than our bed as has been the pattern for the last week. Hopefully, we'll repeat the performance tonight!

Hungry girl

We've been on a two hour feeding schedule for the last 24 hrs. Very intense. At least I hope its hunger and not boredom :-(

Is Easter Sunday today. The Easter bunny has bought chocolates for all the family, although I think it is okay for DH to eat Zoe's egg. Have been bunkering down in the house for the last few days, so am looking forward to a visit to Zoe's cousins at Brunswick, if only for a few hours and a change of scene. Harry will come along too.

Goodbye Uncle Wally

Apologies for the increasing infrequency of these posts. There are a few reasons, the first being, unsurprisingly, time to sit down, and the second is having something of wider interest to post. Everyday is like ground hog day for me, so pulling something 'novel' from that can sometimes be difficult. So this week's news? Zoe has again gained 300g in weight, which puts her at 4kg. I've attached a photo, taken early last week, but it gives an idea of how quickly she is growing. The angle makes her long legs look chubbier than they are, although I do suspect she will be a classically round baby by the time she is 6 months.

Bubba is looking less than attractive at the moment, her face being covered in 'milk spots' or milia, which is a hormonal reaction. Hope this isn't a portent of how her skin will be in her teenage years! Yes, she's still a good girl.

On a sad note, the funeral for Zoe's Great Uncle Wally was held on Monday. I was upset that we couldn't travel to Sydney for the funeral, although did consider it for a short period of time, despite the obvious impracticalities. Zoe's Pa and Aunty Sally and Aunty Melissa went and 'represented' us instead. Wally and his wife Betty were one of the loveliest couples I know - gentle and generous and kind and joyous. Uncle Wally gave a brilliant eulogy at my Mum's funeral in 2002, and was very supportive of her [and us] during her illness, so it is a bitter irony that he, too, succumbed to cancer not so long after. Zoe's life will be less rich for not having met her GUW, but I hope that he saw the photo of her that I sent down a week before his passing.

Health checks

Have just read my last post and unfortunately, have to report that bubba's night time sleep patterns are again sporadic and unpredictable - if waking every two hours for less for an hour and a half counts. So I've wiped that smug 'my baby is so very good' smile off my face.

Our health checks this week went well. Our little poppet put on 350g last week, which is too much again, but the nurse was a little less disapproving when I told her how I had been following her breastfeeding advice to the letter. What could she say? And I now couldn't care less what she thinks. Although, her warnings about my diet and its effects on baby's disposition have worried me enough to cut out nuts, seeds and pulses and to cut down on the amount of fruit I eat. A shame really, given that these are the basis of any good vegetarian diet, and I have really been enjoying my fruit since Zoe was born.

We also had an outing to Lismore yesterday for the hearing test. That went well, which I expected, given that Zoe seems to be responding to voices. She also seems to be focusing in on objects a little more intently, particularly the ducks on her automatic rocker. Such a clever girl!

Sleepy head

We had a couple of restless, sleepless nights over the weekend, which left me worried that I'd 'done something' to change bubba's sleep patterns. But no, we were back to normal last night, sleeping from 830pm to 1230am and again from 130am to 5am. Apparently 5 hours is the longest a new bub should go without a feed, so midnight saw me pacing around 'willing' Zoe to wake up.

Has been sleeping for several hours again this morning. Time now for another feed, nappy and clothes change though. Then we'll walk the dog and go to the baby clinic. I feel the same way about the clinic as I would sitting an exam - not sure what to expect but hoping that I'm properly prepared. Am only hoping to pass today!

A note on the Queen

It seems that I have the same sentimental inclination as my dear Mum. I have kept a copy of The Sydney Morning Herald from March 14, Zoe's birthday, and have stored all the lovely 'new baby' cards that we have been sent. The Herald's front page features a large photo of the Queen, surrounded by supporters waving Australian flags, and an article on two failed $20,000 sports bets. What does this say about Australia in 2006?

Parenting aids

Our first visit to the baby clinic this week went well. For a start, the community nurse was great. She gave us lots of practical advice, probably repeating a few of the things said the previous week by the home visit nurse, but in a much more affable and less judgemental way. Zoe peed all over her changing table, but I think that is par for the course when running a baby clinic. The most interesting advice, repeated by absolutely everyone since Zoe was born, was that I should get a dummy. This time I listened. The nurse noted that babies need sucking time, as distinct from feeding time, and Zoe has been having both of these at my boob, meaning that some evenings she has been almost permanently attached for 5 or 6 hours. This has been quite draining, given that when she is in this mood, she is quite grizzly and finds it difficult to latch on. She had also managed to gain 330g in a week, which is apparently well above the average gain expected, so there is no question of her not getting enough milk.

So the upshot is we went straight to the chemist and purchased some dummies. It was pretty distressing giving her the dummy that night, and I cried when she did manage to take it. It not only looked stupid, this big piece of brightly coloured plastic concealing almost a third of her face, but I also felt as if I had somehow failed her, despite never really ruling a dummy out. But that didn't last long, once I realised that in the break between evening feeds I could sit through dinner and even have a glass of wine. Joy. I'm also pleased that in the days since, she doesn't always accept the dummy, so maybe this will only be a short term measure for helping her settle in the early evening? I've also started to use the automatic rocking seat that Zoe's cousin has lent us a bit more frequently; I well embrace as many parenting aids as I can. As well as swinging back and forth, the chair has a ring of stuffed ducks attached that move around above her head, and she seems genuinely enchanted by these.

Thankfully Zoe's dad could come to the baby clinic with us, as it was his rostered day off. This meant he could work out how to fit the pram in my car. We hadn't thought of that [well, I hadn't]. It is a bit tricky. so much so that yesterday I simply took the sling when I needed to go down town. If the baby is fed and relaxed, she's quite happy to lie in there and doze on and off, although we need some more practice getting her in and out gently.

Today we are staying home all day, hoping to re-establish some of the great sleeping-feeding patterns we had going. It seems that yesterday's trip into town might have thrown things off, and as a consequence, we had a much more unsettled night that usual.

More photos

Here's a link to some photos taken during labour and shortly after Zoe's birth. They have been censored.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/babyreverie/

She's a winner

Have I mentioned how beautiful our little girl is?

Zoe has had most of the skin on her body, feet and hands peel off over the last few days. Okay, that's maybe not very attractive, but it will be over shortly. I'm not sure, but this could be a sign that she was well and truly cooked by the time she was born? Maybe all babies peel. I checked the birthing photos yesterday, and she had very little vernix on her when born, just some on her back, so this suggests she was definately overdue. I would hate to think how little she would have been if she had arrived any earlier.

She has no other marks on her skin. No freckles or moles or birthmarks, which I hope means she has inherited her father's beautiful complexion [at least it was, before he started working outdoors in Australia].

We had a great night's sleep last night. I had expected her to have a grizzling period between 9pm and midnight, like most other nights this week, but she slept through until 1am, then did not wake again until 430am. If she keeps sleeping this well, I'm going to need to get up at night and express some milk for pain relief; the last two nights I've been lying there willing her to wake!

We had our first outing in the pram this week with Harry dog. The dog was just happy to see me and be out and about. He is curious about what is in the pram, and has a quick sniff around, but the lake and its doggy smells are more tempting.

Zoe has also proved to be a good tip for the racetrack. Dashing Zoe placed in her race at the Hawesbury racetrack yesterday, and my Dad and sister were lucky enough to have a bet on. Go Zoe!

Heureux anniversaire

One week old today! Where has the week gone?

Yesterday was an eventful day for bubba Zoe [and Mum]. We started the day feeling very smug and happy with our baby raising skills; we are sleeping and feeding easily, and nappy changing is becoming second nature. My lovely boss has given us a nappy service as a gift, and they called to say they would be delivering a week's worth of nappies tomorrow. Joy. What more could mother and baby want?

Then the early childhoood nurse called around. While clearly a nice lady with a real interest in the welfare of babies, this woman questioned the amount of time we spend feeding, suggesting that things need to slow down. This was a clear contradiction of what I have read and was told by most of the midwives at the birthing centre. And certainly not supported by the generally happy and healthy disposition of bubba, who when put on the scales had gained another 10g in 2 days ['but she has just had a feed'].

I also made the mistake of putting bubba on the floor of the loungeroom while she was here. This was clearly the height of poor hygiene, and my visitor proceeded to tell me so. Ewan just sat and watched in horror. The irony is, I've never put her on the floor before to change a nappy, and while down there, I could see that the room did need a good vacuum. There were a few other suggestions too - I should not walk my dog for at least another few weeks [how very cruel], and should not be offering both boobs at a feed. Apparently I should be expressing milk as well, which means sterilising equipment. I don't think so! So at the end of her visit I was left feeling very uneasy about my parenting skills [and quite tearful too - had not realised how fragile the emotions are still are, but I guess that's me anyway]. A little bit angry too. I am going to heed the advice of my GP though, who said that we would receive lots of conflicting advice, and I should simly go with my instincts, as generally they are right.

We were able to put that behind us when we went on our first outing last night - to Aunty Sally's linen party. Most of the girls there are fairly new mothers, and could sympathise. A few also breastfeed, so I could benchmark what I'm doing with their experience. So a good bitch session set things straight, and it seems a few girls had the same experience with the same woman.

Zoe enjoyed the party. She was oohed and ahhed over plenty, and had lots of cuddles and a few presents too. Unfortunately, it was also the beginning of her high needs period of the day, so I spent a lot of time in the bedroom feeding, but with plenty of company. I guess I enjoyed myself too, and was able to prove that small outings are not out of the question, even if only to Aunty Sal's three blocks away!

Other milestones achieved this week: umbilical stump fell off; Aunty Mellie visited for cuddles; first bath at home with Mum and Dad [was a bit bemused, but don't think she found it unpleasant].

We will celebrate her anniversary today with some lovely banana cake that cousin Ella's nanny made for us.

Zoe has arrived

Here's a picture of our beautiful little girl who arrived at 620 pm on Tuesday 14th March (6lb10 or 2.7 kg). The labour was long - 22 hours - and drug free, but entirely worth it. This was possible thanks to my dear sister and husband, who provided fantastic support. And the midwives at Mullumbimby hospital were superb. Zoe was very alert at birth and scored apgar's of 9 at 1 minute and 9 at 5 minutes. We laboured on and off in the birthing pool, but in the end chose to have her 'on land'. We were kicked out of hospital yesterday, so have just survived our first night at home. The breastfeeding routine is exhausting, but the fact that Zoe had gained 60g in her first four days [usually babies lose weight over the first week] is testament to the fact that it is working.

We received lots of beautiful flowers and gifts for the bubba already. Thanks to everyone who has done this. I'll be in touch personally soon. Have also had a chuckle reading the comments posts from OJ, Dave, Jo and Anna. Thanks for the encouragement guys!

I also intend to post more photos and possibly a full description of the labour in the next few days. Stay tuned.

False labour

Called the hospital yesterday and had a reassuring talk with the midwife on duty, who suggested that things were underway, and that I should rest and eat well. Both of which I managed. I also managed to gouge a hole in hubby's hairstyle while helping him clipper his hair. Forgot to put the guard on. Thankfully, we both saw the funny side, and had a big belly laugh about it. Now he's sporting a remedial buzz cut, which is a little confronting, but doesn't look too bad [that's what we're all saying].

Had expectations that today might have been the day that bubba graced us, based both on the midwife's reassurances and some signs of labour, including contraction-like pains in my lower belly, which kept me up all night. But I now think this is a 'false labour' - one which doesn't open the cervix. Did manage to get a little sleep, but spent most of the night watching movies, with lots of walking when the 'contractions' hit. Have decided to accept my 'labour' for what it is. Am having these contractions as I write, which require me to do a lap of the house...

GI Joe and I have an appointment at the doctor's at 3pm today, ostensibly to discuss inducement. I had given some thought to refusing an intervention at this stage, based of course on a check of the baby's condition, but will keep an open mind. We'll take our bags [seem to have an awful lot of gear packed] with us, just in case we get sent straight to the hospital. Who knows which one.

If we come back home [which is my expectation], I promise to post an update otherwise, thanks for thinking of us, and be assured that we will call once we have some good news.

Still waiting

No baby yet, I'm afraid.

Progress!

Something must be working - had a show last night that woke me up around 1am. Was very exciting, but this hasn't been backed up with contractions. Have sent hubby to work, and am still considering keeping my movie date to see Brokeback Mountain today - despite my family suggesting otherwise. Will also keep my acupuncture appointment this afternoon, if no progress by then.

The attached picture of of the bub was taken about 10 days ago.

Change of attitude

Acupuncture session this morning was great - apparently my pulse is on the way down, which is a good sign, and he was able to reduce it further. Had to pull out the heavy duty needles for this one. Have booked another session for late tomorrow, just in case the little bugger doesn't budge by then. Am also taking black cohosh and have been getting jiggy with Ewan in the bedroom - this is supposed to help! Hope I haven't turned anyone off...

Feeling much more positive now. Just need to get this strange man out of my house [the builder]. Am thinking that his presence might be a bit of a block.

Baby room photo

Here's a photo the baby's room - just to prove we are ready! That said, our intention is to have bubba sleep in our room in a bassinet for the first few months. And I know the baby doesn't notice, but I anticipate having to spend a bit of time in there too!

please don't induce me

Have been awake all night ... thought it best to hop out of bed and let hubby get some sleep before he heads off to work today. The reason for this wakefulness - despite being tired most of the time during the day - was our visit to our GP yesterday. The bottom line is, that unless this 'overdue' baby arrives soon, we'll need to look at a medical induction, and that can only take place at the large base hospital. This is so contrary to our needs and expectations for this birth! And I promised myself I wouldn't get disappointed if we ended up there, but our hearts are really set on having this water birth at Mullum.

My GP suggested that Saturday was the day to discuss induction - I immediately asked that we leave it until Monday, which he agreed to. So we've won a few more days. Come on baby! Hopefully tomorrow's session of acupuncture will have some effect... The truth is though, I think that bubba is quite content in the womb, and will come when he/she is damn well ready.

dishwasher day

It is now several days past my 'due date', and no sign that bubba is ready to face us yet. Plenty of braxton-hicks contractions and lots of kicking and squirming, to remind me that he/she's there! I had hoped that the weekend of rain and mild flooding (typical North Coast weather) would somehow coax bubba out... a drive through flooded roads in the pouring rain would have made a great birth story.

I am swimming between calm and cranky at an alarming rate today. My dear husband (DH) is home from work today - the pressure to produce an infant is even strong from that side, with his boss 'scheduling' time off for him this week. A visit to the doctor tomorrow will reveal more, but I'm hoping he'll agree to me trying some acupuncture to induce labour (he's very supportive of natural therapies, given our plan to have a natural water birth). Yes, we've tried the curries and and the walking in soft sand and some of the other not-unpleasant activities suggested for induction.

Was able to go for a long walk with the dog, DH and my Dad on the beach this morning, which was nice - it is such a beautiful day. Am trying to enjoy these moments 'while we can'. The next distraction? Go grocery shopping, mainly to get out of the house while the builder installs our new dishwasher (yeah!).

Waiting for bub

Welcome to my first post! I've created this blog as a place to share stories and pictures of our beloved bub with family and friends, once he or she arrives. Today's post is also a place for me to express some of my current frustration at being full term pregnant and not having met our new bub yet.

My due date was yesterday, the first of March 06. Yesterday was also the first day in some time that I had a sudden burst of unexplained tears. Mentally, I had approached the day as I would any other day, knowing that only 5% of babies arrive on their due date. By the end of the day however, after many phone calls from well wishers and the inquisitive, my 'everything as normal' facade disappeared. My poor husband Ewan was a little unprepared for the tears at the dinner table. I suspect he is as 'on edge' about our impending arrival as I am. Suprisingly though, I don't have any apparent anxiety about the actual birth.

Ewan keeps modelling scenarios for getting me to the hospital when I go into labour, which I guess for him is the only time during the birth that he will have a starring role. My suggestion is that he will calmly return from his work, should I be labouring during the day, calmly shower and then we will calmly hop in the car, pick up my lovely sister who is providing further support, and calmly take the 40 minute drive to the hospital. Those people who know my dear husband [DH] would recognise the thread of optimism in this projected scenario.